Make Do And Mend #2

Heartily fed up with consumer kit that doesn't deliver the goods, the Diplo 'shop has always been resourceful in creating solutions to practical problems. I have mentioned before, on these pages, that I suffer from an irrational need to fix failed kit and I'm pleased to report that the make-do-and-mend approach is alive and kicking at Diplo HQ. A planned cycling trip to the Peak District has inspired Diplo Jnr to fettle himself a machine out of the selection of skip-find two wheeled orphans that forms his cycle collection. His chosen steed is this 23" British racer of unknown make running on 27" rims fitted with tyres that are reckoned to be 20 years old. The wheels have been stripped down, the tyres checked over and freed from the rims, new tubes have been fitted in a cloud of talcum powder as a non-stick dodge. The front derailleur is missing the selector fork so he's fettling one out of scrap from the 'shop. This 220 mile unsupported expedition, plus a climb of Kinder Scout, will require the hauling of a few items of kit (tent, stove etc) - hence the rather fine pannier rack illustrated above. The stores at Diplo HQ came up trumps and yielded a supply of skip-find galvanised wall plate straps - practically designed for the job and lending a thoroughly appropriate Meccano flavour to the design. I'm pleased to witness this all going on in a spirit of defiance amid the onslaught of glossy-techno-titanium-carbon fibre products being thrust at us in magazines, TV adverts and the like. I don't think Diplo Jnr's missing out on anything in having to scrape the metaphorical scrap bin to mount his expedition - far from it - he's saving his well earned cash for a Mars and some Dandelion and Burdock en-route and making do with what he's got. If you were planning on buying a new fandango bike for such a trip - just hold up a minute and think of the disappointment you could be building up for yourself. The bloody thing'll most likely break down and you just know that, being hi-tech and new, it will suffer from a degree of built in obsolescence that renders it "un-repairable". Build it yourself, keep it simple, stay in control and don't have your trip ruined by technology. The "less-is-more" sentiment comes to mind - but I don't want to roll that one out too often ! Come to think of it - much as I'm a fan of Beemer's GS 1150, and having had many trouble free miles on my own, I was shocked at how easily the Long Way Round team were thrown by a faulty ABS brake controller. This kind of tech can ruin a good thing. MORE MECCANO !

Haystacks & Saddlebacks

The saddlebacks enjoyed a trip to The Lakes last weekend in the shape of sausages and chops. Camping without having to carry all your kit allows for a bigger tent and a few more luxuries - canned veg. I remember the Lockwoods brand (which may still be around) but these canned new potatoes have that same stale, musty-sweet taste that reassures the traveller. The chops were fantastic and the regular fat porker that we have settled on never fails to work. The more attentive of you will have noticed the lack of precipitation evident in the scene - let me assure you that this fine spell broke very soon after supper on day one ! The Diplo expedition was camped on the East shore of Buttermere and upon arrival we were greeted by fine views of High Cragg and Haystacks to tempt us into our boots and breeches. Within two hours these views had become memories as the heavens opened and rain set in for the next 72. Now - I've seen rain (James Taylor) but this was something else, visibility was reduced to yards and the noise of rushing water was soon deafening. Not to be deterred we did mount a sortie to Haystacks and beyond the next morning. Fully loaded with rations and emergency supplies to cover any eventuality the troop was soon wet through. Enjoying a brief rest in the tricky blind scramble approaching the summit at Haystacks I really did feel as though I was standing in a swimming pool. I'm told the views from Haystacks are stunning but as we were fumbling around, establishing the summit cairn by feel, we were unable to enjoy them and the camera was in no fit state to record the event. Not to be put off, the Diplo team is determined to re-visit "The North" in the hope of finding some better weather. Bar-side instructions on the removal of the sparkler for pouring a decent pint were not always well received or understood. MORE DRYING OUT !

No Room At The Inn

'Shop clearance - got to make room for the next project ! How about treating yourself to an environmentally friendly commuter vehicle.
This was a '72 CB175 which now has a CB200 motor. Comfy cruise 55-60 and pretty cool gas-mileage. Of course, being '72, it attracts no RFL charges which is great - very satisfying getting the disc in the post reading "Duty - NIL". Any how, the little beauty, complete with period patina and that lovingly home-built style, is up for grabs - treat yourself. New chain&sprockets, wheel bearings, electrics, MOT test etc. MORE PROJECTS !

Miracle Cure

Those little Saddlebacks done good. As you can see we butchered the latest batch at considerably less weight than the GOS/Tamworths we did last year. The belly fat here is much thinner. To be honest, I prefer a bit more "white meat" but am still very pleased with the result of this dry cure product. The miracle cure I refer to is my knee - my self-prescription of animal fat and Fool's Nook has been doing the job and I am now getting used to walking without a stick again and have lost the Douglas Barder motion that was required to get along without bending the knees. I would like to think that the bacon shown here has contributed to the heeling process. A fresh batch of weaners is due next week ! Gloucester Old Spot X Tamworths again, as last year. MORE MIRACLES !

Flaming June

Blimey - two months off - sorry 'bout that. Actually been very busy but not a huge amount of blog-worthy stuff. The "season" is well and truly upon us and this shot from a school open day back in early June celebrates the arrival of some decent weather. I'm not a big charcoal fan, preferring to make my own as I go by burning huge quantities of seasoned, split oak and ash. The tailgate arrangement does cause concern and it is not unusual for neighbouring pic-nickers to move their precious 4x4 or Bentley GT to the other end of the field. The N/S gas tank leaks quite badly on the Series so wind direction needs to be considered. A spread of hogget chops and chipolatas c/w a pan of garlic-fried new potatoes goes down well on these occasions - on a very warm day you can't beat a cup of Yorkshire Gold to wash it all down. More recently I joined Diplo Junior in an heroic 40 mile sponsored walk in the Brecon Beacons - absolute madness, and carrying a 50lb pack up and down vertiginous terrain has completely ruined my knees. I'm on a strict diet of animal fat and Digfield Brewery's "Fool's Nook" in an attempt to sort them out. On the fettling front - both the XT225 and the CB Special have sailed through the MOT test process.The Series is in for the same as I write ! Having got back on the keyboard I'll try not to leave it so long. MORE REGULARITY !!!
Oh by the way - pigs in freezer and bacon curing under way, yum yum. New weaners coming in a couple of weeks.

More Sausages Part 1

Been off air for a while for which many apologies. Loads has been happening but on the fettling front it has mainly involved the little Honda CB Special. This is a subject which I think has been well flogged. On a more positive note we welcomed a new batch of weaners to Diplo Hall a couple of weeks ago. This year we are going to try and run two batches so we've started a little earlier. These little chaps are pure Saddlebacks, a very interesting breed, more about that later. We are aiming to run these for about 12 weeks having got them at about 7 or 8. This is amazing,they will get to around 65 or 70 kilos in 20 weeks from birth and in very short order will be stretching the seams on the Diplo HQ freezers. Transport for weaners is provided by the trusty Series. The box in the back is an old engine crate and serves for collecting the critters and becomes their home for a week or two until they move into their luxury (bigger) quarters. MORE MEAT PRODUCTION !

Munt Jacket

A brace of Muntjacs made their way to Diplo HQ a couple of weeks ago - much needed protein top up for the freezer and Diplo Junior has plans to make himself a jacket. The Fallow deer here-abouts are pretty easy to skin but I'd forgotten just how tenacious these little critters are. There's very little fat on a Muntjac and in places (around the flanks & shoulders particularly) the flesh and the skin are almost inseparable. Much swearing and delicate knife-work later we had them both stripped and ready for a few days hanging before making their way into the freezer.
The hides have moved on to Shed 2 for curing and tanning. A salt petre cure, after removal of any stray bits of flesh and the tricky membrane that remains attached, takes 4 to 5 days. This is followed by a week's drying - when dry the last few bits of membrane and sinew can be scraped and rubbed away. Next is a good wash in Sodium Carbonate solution and a few rinses through with fresh water.
Meanwhile the tanning solution of Ammonium Alum Sulphate, Sodium Carbonate and Salt is prepared and the hides dunked in for a 4 to 5 day soak. This is where we're at right now. Next stage is a good wash in a Borax solution, much rinsing, drying and oiling. Let you know how we get on. MORE PELTS !